September 20, 2010

  • This is not the end, this is not the beginning, just a voice like a riot rocking every revision. But you listen to the tone and the violet rhythm.. Though the words sound steady.. something empty's within 'em. 

    With fists flying up in the air like we're holding onto something that's invisible there, cos we're living at the mercy of the pain and the fear until we're dead.. It, forget it, Let it all disappear. 

    Waiting for the end to come. Wishing I had strength to stand. This is not what I had planned... 
    It's out of my control.... 

    Flying at the speed of light, thoughts were spinning in my head. So many things were left unsaid... 
    It's hard to let you go... 

    Oh, I know what it takes to move on. I know how it feels to lie. All I wanna do is trade this life for something new...

    Holding on to what I haven't got... 

    Sitting in an empty room trying to forget the past. This was never meant to last... 
    I wish it wasn't so... 

    What was left when that fire was gone? I thought it felt right but that right was wrong. All caught up in the eye of the storm and trying to figure out what it's like moving on... 

    And i don't even know what kind of things I've said... my mouth kept moving and my mind went dead. So, picking up the pieces, now where to begin? 
    The hardest part of ending is starting again!! 

    All I wanna do is trade this life for something new... 

    Holding on to what I haven't got... 

    Holding on to what I never really had.

    xx

    feeling particularly empty and sad lately... feeling the end of summer and warmth and light... feeling what is coming marching ever closer...

    missing my mom... missing a sense of normalcy... missing a sense of knowing what the hell life is all about really... missing a lot of stuff. And missing stuff I have no business missing.